I Can't Be, I'm Not In Love, Right?
by Lily and James Love 4 ever
Summary: One Shot. Lily has weird feeling for a guy and doesn't know what it is. So she asks her friend what it means. R&R. I sux a summarys. Its ALOT better then it sounds.


**A/N I know It went fast but I really liked this one. It was going to have a poem with it but then It stated writing itself. Hope you like. If you want to see the poem that it was going to have email me and I'll send it to you.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**I Can't Be, I'm Not In Love. Right?**

Lily Evans was confused. Yes, the Head Girl was confused. The one with all the answers didn't have the answer to a certain problem she was facing. The problem started with James and ended with Potter. James Potter. Yep that's right. He was everywhere she went. Whether the Library or Heads room. She just couldn't get away from him. But the thing was she would always end up where he was. He would already be there. So she couldn't assume he was stalking her. She went where he was. So it was like she was stalking him. I know what your thinking Lily Evans stalking James Potter, not in a million years. I assure you it wasn't of her free will. Her body just moved on its on. But she wasn't complaining anymore, she had grow fond of James. She didn't like him, like him. But she liked him. And this is where she was getting confused at. Her feelings grew more and more. Maybe to love.

I know your thinking Lily Evans would never love James Potter. Never. The reason because she had hated him since first year. But the key word there is HAD. But now that she looks back she couldn't see how she could have hated him for so long, hated him at all. With his untidy black hair, that made him look like he had just got off a broom. The hair that Lily just wanted to run her fingers through. The hair she had dreamt about for many nights now. His hazel brown eyes, where you could see his soul. The eyes that showed the glint in it when he was thinking about pranking Snape. The eyes Lily got lost in when she looked at them so long. Those eyes had also haunted Lily's dreams for the past week. His lips, Lily had memorized what his lips looked like. She couldn't stand it. Whenever she was confused she would look at James and her eyes would go to his lips.

He didn't notice of course. Or at least she didn't think he did. Truth be told, he did notice. And that made him smile. Which caused Lily to stare at his lips more and more. How she wanted to kiss those lip. Wait, What. Your asking, why would Lily Evans ever think of doing something like that? For she hated James. She was president of the I HATE JAMES POTTER club. which only had two people in it, her and her best friend. And her best friend wasn't really a hater of James Potter. She was only in it because Lily made her be. But those kissable lips, was in Lily's every thought.

Every night Lily would dream the same thing, being kissed by James Potter. She would wake up with a smile on her face, then she would realize that she hated James and then she would jump in the shower to rid herself of of that dream. Only to be thinking of it again. She barley concentrated in her classes. Especially if he was close. Lily started to refer to James as Him. 'Him' wouldn't leave her alone. Though he never said anything to her these days. He was always there.

But when he did talk to her she listened to his voice wondering what it would be like to have it whispering in her ear sweet little nothings or just to repeat her name over and over again. And she would get her wish. He had to keep saying her name over and over again to get her to listen and see if she heard anything he said. Which of course she didn't so he would have to repeat it again. And the process would repeat, until he got tired of it and left. But he usually stayed with a knowing smirk on his face. For he liked to be in Lily's company. Besides when she was yelling at him. But she had stopped most of her yelling.

He knew something was up. She never yelled at him anymore. He would see her looking at him. The way he did her all the time. He knew it was only time before she realized what 'it' was. She liked him and he knew it. But she didn't. And it would would scare her when she found out. Your all thinking what will she do when she figures it out? Well read and you'll see.

Lily had to find out what was wrong with her. She would go to the library more and more to find out what she had. She looked through every book that talked about diseases. But her feeling went in there. There was nothing about getting butterflies in your stomach every time you were around a guy, nothing about feeling weak in the knees when said guy smiles at you, and absolutely nothing about daydreaming you beaning married to said guy. So she had to go to her last resort which was talking to her best friend about the problem. She knew Alison would help her, she always did. Lily had a gut feeling about what it was she just didn't want to admit it until she had to.

So Lily sought out Alison who was snogging her boyfriend, who just happened to be best friends with said guy she was having a problem with. But Lily didn't care, she just pulled Alison away from Sirius. Lily told him she needed to borrow her and she would be back shortly. But she was wrong it would take awhile before she found out what was wrong with her, even with Alison's help.

"Lily what was that about? Couldn't you see I was busy?" Alison said.

"Yes, but I need your help." Lily said.

"With what?" Alison asked "It better be important."

"It is trust me." Lily said and started to explaining everything what she felt everything except the person's name. For his name she said 'Him'

"Well Lily do you want the truth?" Lily nodded. "Your in love. Its as simple as that."

Lily flopped on Alison's bed.

"No I can't be. This can't happen me. I'm Lily Evans. I can't fall in love expecally with him."

Alison smiled. "Who is he, Lily?" she asked.

Lily didn't answer. "I can't be! It's not possible."

"It is possible. And you are."

"Noooooooo."

Alison just stood there listen to her friend deny that she was in love. Alison knew who it was with too. But she wanted Lily to tell her. She was waiting for this for a couple of days. Though she didn't expect it during her 'study' session with Sirius. But she stayed and listened anyway. That's what friends were for. Right. I guess the 'Study' session would just have to wait till later.

Could I really be in love? Lily thought. No that's not possible, especially with James. Potter. It's Potter, always has been, always will be. Hmmm Lily Potter. No. Bad Girl. It's Lily Evans and its never going to be Potter. Or will it? No it never will. Ughh I'm sooo confused. Maybe Alison is right. Maybe just maybe I do like 'him'

"Well lets say your right." Lily said slowly. Alison smiled looking up at Lily. "What should I do?"

"Well you could tell this person. Or you could just let stay inside you eating you up inside. And every time you see this person your heart will you berserk and you'll just want to kiss him. And then if you never tell him, we'll be out of Hogwarts and you'll never see him again and you'll heart will be split in two. And nothing will be the same. So which are you going to choose?"

Lily knew which she had to choose. But she was scared. More afraid then, well, ever. Lily nodded. "I know what I have too do. Can you help me?"

"Of course. Just tell me one thing. Who is this person?" Alison asked smiling.

Lily bite her bottom lip. Her breath getting deeper with every breath she took. "Well, ah... I...its...Do you promise not to scream at me?" Alison nodded her smile so big. "Well its... James Potter." She said before turning the other way so she wouldn't see her face. Lily was blushing madly. Alison had a huge and I mean huge grin on her face.

"Well Lily you know what you have to do." Alison said." Lily nodded. "Do you want me there with you when you tell him?" Lily shook her head. "Are you sure?" Lily nodded again. Before turning back to Alison.

"I can do it. And I will. Tomorrow."

"No Lily, you have to tell him now." Alison said.

"Why?"

"Because you just realized it. Its easier when you first realize it because its all in one blow, not several. If you want I'll walk you to the Heads dorm."

"Thanks Alison." Lily said before hugging her.

"Anytime."

Lily and Alison left the girls dormitory. The common room was almost empty. Except for Sirius, Remus and a couple other students. Lily passed them with out looking at anyone. Alison stayed and talked to Sirius and Remus for a second to tell them to follow her, but not so Lily could see. They nodded and Alison caught up with Lily before she noticed she was gone.

Lily rushed to the Heads room as fast as she could. Alison having to hurry up beside her. And Sirius and Remus behind them without Lily knowing. Lily was at the heads room in two minutes flat. As soon as she got there she wished she had slowed down. She wasn't ready for this.

"Alison do I have to?" Lily asked biting her bottom lip.

"Yes its the only way to get it over and done with." Alison said. Sirius and Remus were under James invisibility cloak they just so happened to have at the time. Sirius and Remus looked curious. "Just go in there and tell him." Sirius started to smile.

"OK I can do it. Thanks Alison. You can go back to the common room now."

"OK. Good luck."

Lily looked back at the front of the Heads room. It was a picture of all the house symbols with an H in the middle. "Prongs and Lily flower." Lily said for the password. As you can tell James made the password up. Lily didn't notice Alison slip under the invisibility cloak. Or feel them pass her as she walked in the Heads common room. James was there all right. He was sitting on the couch in front of the table doing his homework. Lily took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. And walked over and sat down beside James. As she sat sown James looked up and smiled. Lucky for her she had sat down or she would have fell. Lily looked down at her knees. unsure how to say it.

"Uh James." Lily said licking her lips still looking at her knees.

"Yeah" He asked.sitting up straight looking directly at her.

"Well there's something I need to tell you." Lily said. She reluntlly looked up at him directly into his eyes. Big mistake. She could never think when she looked into those beautiful eyes. He just looked her, telling her to continue. "Well I've been thinking lately and...I..." Lily broke off.

"You what?" James asked while brushing a piece of hair out of Lily's face.

"I... I found out something." Lily said trying to put what she wanted to say into words.

"What did you find out?" James asked softly. Lily looked back down at her knees.

"Well, I." She tried to say to her knees but James lifted head head so she was looking him.

"You what?" James said so softly she barely heard it. She never knew how close his face was to hers. How she longed to taste those lips. Meanwhile Sirius, Remus and Alison where still under the invisibility cloak not even two feet from them watching and listening to everything that was beaning said. Lily stated into his eyes. Then looked at his lips. Oh how bad she want to taste those.

"I think I love you." Lily said so quietly. And kissed him. Alison was smiling so hard. Sirius was smirking and Remus was grinning. James pulled back from the kiss.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to say that." He said before kissing her. He pulled back one more time. "Lily," She looked directly into his eyes not afraid anymore. "I love you too." Before kissing her for along time.

Sirius, Remus, and Alison left the new couple to do what all couples do.

**The End. **

**Please review. Tell me what you think.**

**Lily and James Love 4 ever**


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